Thursday, May 29, 2008

Nine Words Of the Female Language

The List Of Nine Words Of the Female Language That Men Need To Learn If They Wish To Survive.

Women have their own language. Men need to learn at least a part of this Foreign Tongue for survival. Every man alive on this planet should print the following list, memorize it, and keep it on their person at all times.

1. Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before doing some chore around the house.

3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "nothing" usually end in "fine".

4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it, or you will pay.

5. Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says "Thanks a lot" - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say "you're welcome" ... that will bring on a "whatever").

8. Whatever: Is a women's non-profane way of saying @#!&% YOU!

9. Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response refer to # 3.

Send this link to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.


Send this link to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, because they know it's true.

No comments: