Oz army

From My InBox:
    ----- Life in the Australian  Army... Text of a letter from a kid from Eromanga to Mum and Dad. (For Those of you not in the know, Eromanga is a small town, west of Quilpie in the far south west  of  Queensland )  

Dear Mum &  Dad,
I am well. Hope youse are too. Tell me big brothers Doug and Phil that the Army is better than workin' on the farm - tell them to get in bloody quick smart before the jobs are all gone! I wuz a bit slow in settling down at first, because ya don't hafta get outta bed until 6am. But I like sleeping in now, cuz all ya gotta do before brekky is make ya bed and shine ya boots and clean ya uniform. 
No bloody cows to milk, no calves to feed, no feed to  stack - nothin'!! Ya haz  gotta shower though, but its not so bad, coz there's lotsa hot water and even a light to see what ya doing!  

At brekky ya get cereal, fruit and eggs but there's no kangaroo steaks or possum stew like wot Mum makes. You don't get fed again until noon and by that time all the city boys are buggered because we've been on a 'route march' - geez it's only just like walking to the windmill in the back paddock!!

This one will kill me brothers Doug and Phil with laughter. I keep getting medals for shootin' - dunno why. The bullseye is as big as a bloody possum's bum and it don't move and it's not firing back at ya like the Johnsons did when our big scrubber bull got into their prize cows before the Ekka last year! All ya gotta do is make yourself comfortable and hit the target - it's a piece of piss!!  You don't even load your own cartridges, they comes in little boxes, and ya don't have to steady yourself against the rollbar of the roo shooting truck when you reload!
Sometimes ya  gotta wrestle with the city boys and I gotta be  real careful coz they break easy -  it's not  like fighting with Doug and Phil and Jack and  Boori and Steve  and Muzza all at once like we do at home after the muster.
Turns out I'm not a bad boxer either and it looks like I'm the best the platoon's got, and I've only been beaten by this one bloke from the Engineers - he's 6 foot 5 and 15 stone and three pick handles across the shoulders and as ya know I'm only 5 foot 7 and eight stone wringin' wet, but I fought him till the other blokes carried me off to the boozer.

I can't complain about the Army - tell the boys to get in quick before  word gets around how bloody good it is.

Your loving daughter,

Sheila

Sued for laughing

From My InBox:

Sued for laughing
This is from an actual trial in the UK.

A young woman who was several months pregnant was sitting in a bus.

When she noticed a young man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on account of her condition.

She changed her seat & he seemed more amused.

She moved again and then on seeing him laughing more, she filed a court case on him.

In the court the Man's defence was:

"When the lady boarded the bus I couldn't help noticing she was pregnant.   She sat under an advertisement, which read 'Coming Soon- The unknown boon'.
I was even more amused when she then sat under a shaving advertisement, which read: 'William's stick did the trick'."

"Then I could not control myself any longer, when on the third move she sat under an advertisement, which read: 'Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this accident.'
The case was dismissed... the judge fell off his chair laughing....

Arrogance of Authority

From My InBox:

A DEA  (Drug Enforcement Agency) officer stopped

at a ranch in Texas , and  talked with an old  rancher.

He told the rancher, "I need to inspect  your ranch for

illegally grown drugs."

The rancher said, "Okay , but  don't go in  that field over there.....",

as he pointed out the  location.

The  DEA officer verbally exploded saying,

" Mister, I  have the authority of  the

Federal Government of the United States of America with me!"

Reaching  into his rear pants pocket, the arrogant

officer removed his badge and  proudly displayed it to the  rancher.

"See this f*****g badge? This badge means I am allowed to

go wherever I  wish.... On any land!

No questions asked or answers given!

Have I made myself clear? ...... Do you understand?"

The rancher then nodded politely,

apologized and went about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams,

looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life,

being chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull.

With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer,

and it seemed likely that he'd sure enough get gored before

he reached safety.

The  officer was clearly terrified.

The rancher threw down his  tools,

ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs.

                 

(I just  love this  part....) 

     

   

"Your  badge!

Show him your f*****g BADGE........ !"

Why teachers drink!

What could be upseting teacher the world over?

From My InBox:

These are so so funny but also sad when you consider the ignorance.


Why Teachers Drink

The following questions were set in last year's GED examination. These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)

Q.  Name the four seasons.
A...  Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar

Q.  How is dew formed?
A...  The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire

Q.  What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A...  If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed

Q.  In a democratic society, how important are elections
A...  Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election

Q.  What are steroids?
A...  Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs
      (Shoot yourself now, there is little hope)

Q.  What happens to your body as you age?
A...  When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental

Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A... He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery
(So true)

Q.  Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A...  Premature death

Q.  What is artificial insemination?
A...  When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow

Q.  How can you delay milk turning sour?
A...  Keep it in the cow
      (Simple, but brilliant)

Q.  How are the main 20 parts of the body categorized (e.g. The abdomen)
A...  The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity.
     The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A,E,I,O,U

Q.  What is the fibula?
A...  A small lie

Q.  What does 'varicose' mean?
A...  Nearby

Q.  What is the most common form of birth control?
A...  Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium
      (That would work)

Q.  Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'.
A...  The caesarean section is a district in Rome

Q.  What is a seizure?
A...  A Roman Emperor.
      (Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit)

Q.  What is a terminal illness?
A...  When you are sick at the airport.
      (Irrefutable)

Q.  What does the word 'benign' mean?
A...  Benign is what you will be after you be eight
      (brilliant)

Q.  What is a turbine?
A...  Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head. Once a Arab boy reaches puberty, he removes his diaper and wraps it around his head.
     

TOP TEN OF EVERYTHING

I did not verify if these facts are true but they look interesting.

From My InBox:

The Australian Poetry Competition

From the Laughter Club:

The Australian Poetry Competition had come down to two finalists; a university graduate and an old aboriginal.

They were given a word, then allowed two minutes to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was ‘TIMBUKTU’

First to read his poem was the university graduate. He stepped to the microphone and said:

Slowly across the desert sand,
Trekked a lonely caravan;
Men on camels two by two,
Destination Timbuktu.

The crowd went crazy! No way could the old aboriginal top that, they thought. The old aboriginal calmly made his way to the microphone and recited:

Me and Tim a huntin' went,
Met three whores in a pop up tent;
They were three, and we were two,
So I bucked one, and Tim buktu.

The aboriginal won.

Ladies, beware when you are at shopping complex's toilet

Story not verified but better safe than sorry.

From My InBox:

Dear ladies

beware of the latest tactic of bag-snatch.

Last Wednesday 21.07.10 @ I 8.15 p.m, I was at Berjaya Times Square toilet.

Someone quietly walked in  & I thought it was my daughter trying to frighten me. I was expecting my daughter to put her foot thru under the door but what I saw was a man's shoe.

Immediately he jumped up & tried to grab something from the "hanger" on my door. I screamed out of fear as I suddenly saw a pair of black hands reaching in (Indian man)  & he left. When the security guards came, he was gone. The guard told me that on the same day afternoon a lady lost her bag that way.  (I didnt loose my bag coz I did not hang it on the hook)

My neighbor told me that 2 weeks ago, a malay lady's bag was snatched by a man who followed her into the Ladies toilet.

pls beware when you are alone in the toilet & do not hang your bag on the hook of the toilet door.

Failure List of The Famous

Don't know if these are true stories but why care when they are so motivating.

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From My InBoxL

When you feel a little discouraged, just remember what these people accomplished when everyone else looked at them as failures. Believe in Yourself!



Einstein was 4 years old before he could speak.

Isaac Newton did poorly in grade school and was considered "unpromising."



When Thomas Edison was a youngster, his teacher told him he was too stupid to learn anything. He was counseled to go into a field where he might succeed by virtue of his pleasant personality.



F.W. Woolworth got a job in a dry goods store when he was 21, but his boss would not permit him to wait on customers because he "didn't have enough sense to close a sale."



Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team.



Bob Cousy, a legendary Boston Celtic basketball player, suffered the same fate, but he too is a Hall of Famer.



A newspaper editor fired Walt Disney because he "lacked imagination and had no original ideas."



Winston Churchill failed 6th grade and had to repeat it because he did not complete the tests that were required for promotion.



Babe Ruth struck out 1,300 times, a major league record.



A person may make mistakes, but is not a failure until he or she starts blaming someone else. We must believe in ourselves, and somewhere along the road of life we will meet someone who sees greatness in us and lets us know it

Road incident experienced by Jessica Teh

I don't know if this really happened, but if it had, I think the driver should have sounded her horn to alert others around her, which she did not. Do you think this is a true story?

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From My InBox:

Subject: Fw: Road incident experienced by Jessica Teh

Hi Everyone,
Pastor Guy has asked me to share my stories about recent road incidents which I really apologized have taken so long due to my many demands in time as mom to a very very active, demanding, emotional, etc...2-year old toddler!

I have recently experienced a near attempted robbery while I was in the car (with Evan) and had friends who experienced the same few weeks later. During this very tough and difficult financial crisis, the cases of road robberies (or any kind of robbery) are getting rampant and we need to be watchful wherever we go (at any time of the day). We need to keep our families and loved ones in prayer at all times.

Few weeks ago while I was taking Evan back from my mom's place, I experienced an attempted robbery while I was still in my car with Evan! A screeching sound of a motorcyle behind initially had me wondering if an accident occurred. But to my shock, the second motorcyclist flew onto the window of my passenger seat and started using his helmet and another sharp object to break the glass. At first I was still wondering whether the guy had an accident and flew onto my window (cos I don't see ppl flying to your window everyday!!) Then after 2 attempts to whack the glass, I knew he was trying to shatter it. It happened really fast and I couldn't escape and drive away because I was sandwiched between cars at the traffic light (along 17/1 just before turning to Damansara Highway ). All I could do was pray...and after 4-5 times of very hard whacking he gave up. My glass didn't shatter because I had installed a security film that holds the glass together.... although there were tiny pieces of the side that had already landed on the passenger seat.

To my horror, as the traffic light had not turned green yet, the guy immediately targeted another car on the opposite side of the road, and I am very sure the guy didn't have time to see if there was any handbag or items in the car because within less than 10 seconds he started smashing her window as well. This was an old car with a woman in her 40-50s. He took her belongings. Obviously she was screaming and nobody could do anything as the traffic light turned green and everybody left.

I had to take a slow drive home as the glass to the side of the window was slowly crumbling, but am so thankful that the glass didn't completely shatter and Evan was not shaken by the incident. And I had locked all my doors! But I still had the image of the man's evil look in my mind over the next few days. I had never seen such an evil look upfront and upclose before!

2 weeks later, a close friend experienced the same thing. I had just shared with her my experience the week before and she was the only one who had installed security films to her windows as well. She was going to a shop in Old Klang Road with her sister. She came down from the car while her sister sat at the passenger seat to wait for her. (It is advisable for everyone to leave the car and not wait inside nowadays!) A man came to the passenger seat window (where her sister was) and started smashing the window with a sharp object. Obviously it took a while to shatter the glass due to the film, but because the car was parked and he had more time, he continued whacking until the whole glass piece shattered. This was at 3 p.m. in the afternoon. After screaming her lungs out, the guy fled without taking her bag but she was bleeding due to the glass falling on her and in trauma. Really thank God the glass didn't go into her eye (nearly did!).

There are actually more cases from my friends relatives..mostly at traffic lights. This incidents just proves to warn us over and over again to be wary of our surroundings. ...and esp ladies (cos we are the main targets!) to hide your bags or don't carry any bags if you can, to avoid trouble. Let's continue to pray for safety everywhere we are, at anytime of the day.

Trivials

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it ! )

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G..!)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes..
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)
(I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour
(Don't try this at home, maybe at work)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
(Honey, I'm home. What the...?!)

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes.. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life....quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmmm......)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.

(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Okay, so that would be a good thing)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
( I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too..)

Polar bears are left-handed. (If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig??)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread these crazy facts and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to, maybe even a chuckle!

In other words, send it to everyone!
(and God love that pig!)

NEVER LIGHT CANDLE in AIR-CON. ROOM

I am not able to verify if this is a true story. However, there are many ways to enjoy aromatherapy so why take chances by lighting a candle while you are asleep in an enclosed room?

Hoax Slayer wrote about this email in 2004. Read some useful information posted about carbon monoxide poisoning with this story.
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For those who sleep in the air-cond room
A friend of mine has passed away recently,
Please read the mail below and be careful.

Heard of a bad news regarding Charleine, who
studied in MSMKL with some of us. She passed
away last weekend due to carbon monoxide poisoning.

It happened when she lighted an aromatheraputic
candle for the night in a room with air-conditioning
on and all windows closed.

Due to lack of oxygen in the room, the burning of the
candle cannot fully oxidized & thus forming dangerous
carbon monoxide.

Carbon monoxide will prevent oxygen exchange in the
lungs, resulting the person dozing off to state of
unconsciousness & eventually death in less than 1 hour,
depending on the room size.

I am sending this e-mail out to all of you so that you will be aware of such
danger when lighting aromatheraputic candles in any unventilated rooms.

Please forward this email to all your love ones.

A Modern Parable.

From My InBox:

A Japanese company ( Toyota ) and an American company (Ford Motors)
decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River Both teams practiced
long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race.

On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile.

The Americans, very discouraged and depressed, decided to investigate the
reason for the crushing defeat. A management team made up of senior
management was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action.

Their conclusion was the Japanese had 8 people rowing and 1 person
steering, while the American team had 7 people steering and 2 people
rowing.

Feeling a deeper study was in order; American management hired a consulting
company and paid them a large amount of money for a second opinion.

They advised, of course, that too many people were steering the boat, while
not enough people were rowing.

Not sure of how to utilize that information, but wanting to prevent
another loss to the Japanese, the rowing team's management structure was
totally reorganized to 4 steering supervisors, 2 area steering
superintendents and 1 assistant superintendent steering manager.

They also implemented a new performance system that would give the 2 people
rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. It was called the
'Rowing Team Quality First Program,' with meetings, dinners and free pens
for the rowers. There was discussion of getting new paddles, canoes and
other equipment, extra vacation days for practices and bonuses. The
pension program was trimmed to 'equal the competition' and some of the
resultant savings were channeled into morale boosting programs and teamwork
posters.

The next year the Japanese won by two miles.

Humiliated, the American management laid-o ff one rower , halted
development of a new canoe, sold all t! he paddle as, and canceled all
capital investments for new equipment. The money saved was distributed to
the Senior Executives as bonuses.

The next year, try as he might, the lone designated rower was unable to
even finish the race (having no paddles,) so he was laid off for
unacceptable performance, all canoe equipment was sold and the next year's
racing team was out-sourced to India.

Sadly, the End.

Here's something else to think about: Ford has spent the last thirty years
moving all its factories out of the US , claiming they can't make money
paying American wages.

TOYOTA has spent the last thirty years building more than a dozen plants
inside the US The last quarter's results:

TOYOTA makes 4 billion in profits while Ford racked up 9 billion in losses.

Ford folks are still scratching their heads, and collecting bonuses...

IF THIS WEREN'T SO TRUE IT MIGHT BE FUNNY

BEWARE - VERY SOPHISTICATED WAY TO CHEAT YOU

I have not verified this story yet. Anyway, I think that it is an interesting scheme to be aware of even if it is not a true story.
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From My InBox:

I want to let you all know that Frank and I have been the victims of

credit card fraud this week and felt I should warn you all about the

clever scam. It works like this:

Last Wednesday I had a phone call late morning from Express Couriers to

ask if I was going to be home as he had a delivery for me. He said he

would there in roughly an hour. He turned up with a beautiful basket of

flowers and wine. I expressed my surprise as I wasn't expecting anything

like this and said I was intrigued to know who was sending me such a

lovely gift. He said he was only delivering the gift and the card was

being sent separately (the card has never arrived). There was a

consignment note with the gift.

He went on to explain that because the gift contained alcohol he has to

charge the recipient $3.50 as proof that he has actually delivered to an

adult, and not left it on a door step if the recipient is out, to be

stolen or taken by children. This seemed logical and I offered to get

the cash. He then said that the company required the payment to be by

Eftpos so he's not handling cash and everything is properly accounted

for. Frank was there and got his credit card and 'John' swiped the card

on this small mobile machine that also had a small screen upon which

Frank entered in his pin number. A receipt was printed out and given to

us.

Between last Thursday and Monday $4,000 was withdrawn from our credit

account at ATM machines in the north shore area. It appears a dummy

credit card was made using the details in the machine and of course,

they had Frank's pin number.

The Bank has stopped our cards and I've been to the Police this morning,

where they confirmed that it is a definite scam and many households were

hit during the first 3 days of October.

So PLEASE be wary of accepting a gift you're not expecting especially if

the card is not with it. We've all received gifts like this and would

never dream that it could be such a despicable act. Please also let

other female friends and relatives know. Hopefully, these fraudsters

have ceased this activity by now but you never know. I wanted to warn

all my friends.

Gina



P.S. I don't think I'll ever drink the wine - I'd probably choke on it!

Heard of HAARP? (Is it true?)

Benjamin Fulford (born 1961) is a journalist and author of Canadian descent living in Japan.

He investigated and discovered that the US have been able to alter the climate, and by using high power microwave energy can induce earth quakes. In this video posted on YouTube, he talk about the program HAARP (High Frequency Active Auroral Research Program) that had created disaster, such as, the Asian Tsunami, Japanese and Chinese quakes.

How to know if the milk products made in China or Taiwan

I checked a packet of vegetarian noodle I have from Taiwan and see that the first 3 digits of the code are "471" as indicated in the email below. However, the digits of a "made in China" Aztech Wireless broadband router I have, are "658".

According to How Stuff Works, the stripes of lines that you see in the photo below is known as Universal Product Code (UPC) bar code. A company called the Uniform Code Council (UCC) provides manufacturers permission to enter their UPC system to apply for their own six-digit manufacturer identification number which they have to pay an annual fee for.

To have an idea what the numbers printed at the side of the bars mean, take a look at article, "How is the Price Determined?".

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From My InBox:

With more and more milk products from China and Taiwan having problem. We really got to check where the things are produced. Here is a way to differentiate Taiwan made products and China made products : by looking at first three digits of its Bar Code.


If the 1st 3 digits are 690, 691 or 692 - China made

If the 1st 3 digits are 471 – Taiwan made

Pangas fish (Dory Fish)

I received this message from a friend. Though I am not able to verify if this message is true, I would rather play on the safe side and post this message since my children love to eat fish and chips and I tend to buy fillet of Dory.

However, I managed to find an article on "Frozen fish" a Food safety write up by CHIA JOO SUAN.

He said that seafood must be kept chilled or frozen to maintain freshness. Stale seafood has a substance build up known as histamine and these are some of the symptoms of people who are allergic to it:

1) itching on the lips
2) flushes
3) nausea
4) vomiting and hives
5) in severe cases, difficulty in breathing.

These reactions can occur immediately or later after eating stale seafood.

Read his article on how fish freshness are maintained commercially. Note that:

1) marinating fish with salt or sugar slows down the growth of bacteria.
2) Fish treated with carbon monoxide is bright red when first defrosted. So even if the fish has not been kept at temperatures low enough to maintain freshness, the fish would still look good enough to eat when in actual fact, it may have started to deteriorate.

I would love to hear from anyone who can verify this.
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From My InBox:

A lot of the cafes and coffee houses use Dory fish for their fish & chips!

Please share this forwarded article with your family!

It is called Sutchi and I saw many housewives snatching up the fish at
supermarkets as they are really reasonably priced. The fish looks
good but read the article and you will be shocked.

My colleague who deals with seafood confirmed that this is true. This
product is from Vietnam and unless you know the right supplier which
most of us won't, so be safe!


Hi all:

Sutchi is sold in Singapore supermarkets and I've got a stinking
feeling its the same thing!

To be 100% sure that we're not eating Pangas, better not order fish n
chips when eating out!!

Do you eat this frozen fish called Pangas ? France . The French are
slurping up Pangas like it's their last meal of soup noodles. They are
very, very affordable (cheap), are sold in filets with no bones and
they have a neutral (bland) flavor and texture; many would compare it
to cod and sole, only much cheaper. But as tasty as some people may
find it, there's, in fact, something hugely unsavory about it. I hope
the information provided here will serve as very important information
for you and your future choices. Here's why I think it is better left
in the shops (and not on your dinner plates):


1. Pangas are teeming with high levels of poisons and bacteria. (
industrial effluents, arsenic, and toxic and hazardous by-products of
the growing industrial sector, polychlorinated biphenyls (PCBs), DDT
and its metabolites (DDTs), metal contaminants, chlordane-related
compounds (CHLs), hexachlorocyclohexane isomers (HCHs), and
hexachlorobenzene (HCB) ).

The reasons are that the Mekong River is one of the most polluted
rivers on the planet and this is where pangas are farmed and
industries along the river dump chemicals and industrial waste
directly into it. To Note: a friend lab tests these fish and tells us
to avoid eating them due to high amounts of contamination. Regardless
of the reports and recommendations against selling them, the
supermarkets still sell them to the general public knowing they are
contaminated.

2. They freeze Pangas in contaminated river water.

3. Pangas are not environmentally sustainable, a most unsustainable
food you could possibly eat - 'Buy local' means creating the least
amount of environmental harm as possible. This is the very opposite
end of the spectrum of sustainable consumerism. Pangas are raised in
Vietnam .. Pangas are fed food that comes from Peru ( more on that
below ), their hormones ( which are injected into the female Pangas )
come from Chin a . ( More about that below ) and finally, they are
transported from Vietnam to France . That's not just a giant carbon
foot print, that's a carbon continent of a foot print.

4. There's nothing natural about Pangas - They're fed dead fish
remnants and bones, dried and ground into a flour, from South America
, manioc ( cassava ) and residue from soy and grains. This kind of
nourishment doesn't even remotely resemble what they eat in nature.
But what it does resemble is the method of feeding mad cows ( cows
were fed cows, remember? ). What they feed pangas is completely
unregulated so there are most likely other dangerous substances and
hormones thrown into the mix. The pangas grow at a speed light (
practically! ) : 4 times faster than in nature¡Kso it makes you wonder
what exactly is in their food? Your guess is as good as mine.

5. Pangas are Injected with Hormones Derived from Urine - I don't know
how someone came up with this one out but they've discovered that if
they inject female Pangas with hormones made from the dehydrated urine
of pregnant women, the female Pangas grow much quicker and produce
eggs faster ( one Panga can lay approximately 500,000 eggs at one time
). Essentially, they're injecting fish with hormones ( they come all
of the way from a pharmaceutical company in Chin a ) to speed up the
process of growth and reproduction. That isn't good. Some of you might
not mind eating fish injected with dehydrated pee, so if you don't,
good for you, but just consider the rest of the reasons to NOT eat
it..

6. You get what you pay for - and then some. Don't be lured in by
insanely cheap price of Pangas. Is it worth risking your health and
the health of your family?

7. Buying Pangas supports unscrupulous, greedy evil corporations and
food conglomerates that don't care about the health and well-being of
human beings. They only are concerned about selling as many pangas as
possible to unsuspecting consumers. These corporations only care about
selling and making more money at whatever cost to the public.

8. Pangas will make you sick - If ( for reasons in #1 above ) you
don't get immediately ill with vomiting, diarrhea and effects from
severe food poisoning, congratulations, you have an iron stomach! But
you're still ingesting POISON not poisson.

Final important note: Because of the prodigious amount of availability
of Pangas, be warned that they will certainly find their way into
other foods: surimi ( those pressed fish things, imitation crab sticks
), fish sticks, fish terrines, and probably in some pet foods. ( Warn
your dogs and cats and hamsters and gerbils and even your pet fish! )
So, when you do your next round of shopping of frozen fish,
or eating out at cafes / food stalls by choosing fish-&-chips, think twice !!
You have been warned !!!

Did You Know That

Received this presentation in my mailbox today. Want know if these facts are true? Check out the post by Guestb1f625 in response to the same posted by Severus on Slideshare.

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Did You Know That

View SlideShare presentation or Upload your own. (tags: information humor)

Avoid Drinking Fresh Sugar Cane Juice

I have read this before a few years back and its back again. Suagr cane drinks are now served in a dispensing machine at coffee shops in my neighbourhood. So, I am not able to verify by observation if this story is true. What do you think?
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From My InBox:

Please take 2 mins to read this.

This email was sent by a friend whose father is working with the Ministry of the Environment in S'pore.

Health News - About Sugar Cane Drinks

A friend whose father works for the government health inspection passed on his info. Their job is to inspect all hawkers, their cooked food, their store hygiene, etc. They found sugar cane juice has the highest content of bacteria among all food. In fact, it has exceeded the set limit.

Hence, these guys had to find out why. They went round all sugar cane stores and watched the way the hawkers handled their sugar cane, wash their glasses, their entire procedure. But they couldn't find the problem.

One day, they stayed till closing time and discovered some shocking facts! Whenever, the hawkers closed their stores, they would wash the floor with detergent.. As we know, the remaining sugar canes will be placed at the back of the store, vertically standing and as sugar canes are very porous, they tend to absorb whatever liquid around them. Besides the soapy water, the dirt on hawkers' boots, cats' urine, etc, will all be absorbed?? Now, whenever I eat at a hawker centre, I would warn all my friends about this and of course I stopped drinking my favorite sugar cane juice.

A friend, who loved sugar cane juice, was pregnant. She was always drinking sugar cane juice. Anyway, one day she miscarried and the fetus was already like 6 or 7 months old, I think. When the doctors did an autopsy to find out why all of a sudden the fetus had died inside her, they found traces of some chemical substance, which was found in cat urine. Large traces of it.

While it would not be able to harm adults, it was extremely toxic to babies, what more a fetus? So they tried to determine how this cat urine thing could have ended up in the fetus. This meant that it had to be digested by the mother, right? And the only logical conclusion they could come up with was that since these sugar cane juice stall holders just leave the canes lying around on the wet and dirty floor, it would not be impossible to think that stray cats could have peed on those sugar canes or near those sugar canes. So think carefully the next time you order that favorite sugar cane juice!

Please pass this on to everyone you know in S'pore & M'sia. Let's take action to make this world a better & safer place for all of us & the generations to come...

Israeli Sense of Humour at UN

I am not able to verify this story.

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From My InBox

An ingenious example of speech and politics occurred recently in the United Nations Assembly and made the world community smile.

The representative from Israel began:

'Before beginning my talk I want to tell you something about Moses. When he struck the rock and it brought forth water, he thought, 'What a good opportunity to have a bath!'

He removed his clothes, put them aside on the rock and entered the water.

When he got out and wanted to dress, his clothes had vanished. A Palestinian had stolen them.'

The Palestinian representative to the UN jumped up furiously and shouted,

'What are you talking about? The Palestinians weren't even there then.'

The Israeli representative smiled and said 'And now that we have made that clear, I will begin my speech.'

How to acheive good vision during heavy downpour...

I suggest that you do not try this while you are driving in a downpour. Park your car at the side of the road and test it out first.

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From My InBox:

How to acheive good vision during heavy downpour, while you are driving.

> We are not sure how effective it is, just try this method
> when it rains heavily.
> This method was told by a Police friend who had experienced
> and confirmed it.... it is useful...even driving at night.
>
> Most of the motorists would turn on HIGH or FASTEST SPEED
> of the wipers during heavy downpour, yet the visibilty in
> front of the windscreen is still bad.....
>
> Thus, in the event you face such situation, just try your
> SUN GLASSES ( any model will do), and
> miracle................
> All of a sudden, your visibility in front of your
> windscreen are perfectly clear, as if there is no
> rain.................
> Try it yourself and share it with your
> friends..............
> Make sure you have a pair of SUN GLASSES in your car, you
> are not only helping yourself to drive safely with good
> vision, but also you might save your friend's life when
> driving in the rain................
>
Hurry before someone else does!