From My InBox:
Way back in the Empirical days of long unaccompanied tours in the Indian Army, a General and his loyal and long time Cpl batman (Jones) were demobbed following the disbandment of the Indian Army.
Both returned to Blighty and went their separate ways. Whilst the General retired happily with his wife, Cpl Jones was having a hard time finding a job.
One Saturday morning ex-Cpl Jones was out shopping in the village and to his great surprise he spotted the ex-General walking towards him on the footpath.
'Hello Sir!' The General looked up. 'Hello Jones fancy seeing you again. How are you?' 'Pretty bad Sir, I can't find a job and I'm broke' said Jones.
The General thought and said 'You know Jones I've really missed you after all those years together in India. How would you like a job as my batman here in England? I'll pay you a good rate and I'd want exactly the same service you gave me in India. I should like it if you could start first thing tomorrow with morning tea. How about it Jones?'. Well! Jones was beside himself with joy. 'Certainly Sir, thank you Sir. I'll see you tomorrow then'.
The following morning Jones went excitedly to the General's house, same procedure as in India. Made him a cup of tea, placed the newspaper and biscuits on a tray and took them upstairs to the General's bedroom. He entered the bedroom, noticed the General as usual was accompanied in bed. Jones pulled back the curtains and said 'Good morning General, it's a lovely morning, the sun's shining the birds are singing and here is your cup of tea'. 'Thank you Jones' said the sleepy General.
With that Jones went round the other side of the bed, pulled back the bedclothes from the General's wife, turned her over onto her stomach, slapped her backside and said 'Come on dear, back to the village!'.
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