In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the
Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli,
cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red
vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would
live long and healthy lives.
Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben
and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And
Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?"
And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long
as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained
10 pounds. And Satan smiled.
And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman
might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And
Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat,
and sugar from the cane and combined them. And
Woman went from size 6 to size 14.
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan
presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery
croutons and garlic toast on the side. And Man and
Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy
vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them."
And
Satan brought forth deep fried fish and
chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own
platter. And Man gained more weight and his
cholesterol went through the roof.
God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named
it "Angel Food C ake," and said, "It is good."
Satan then created chocolate cake and named it
"Devil's Food."
God then brought forth running shoes so that His
children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan
gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would
not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and
Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue
light and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low
in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled
off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center
into chips and deep-fried them. And
Man gained pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume
fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And
Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double
cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with
that?"
And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!" And
Satan said, "It is good." And Man went into
cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.
Then Satan created HMOs.
If you don't send this to five old friends right
away there will be five fewer people laughing in
the world.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
IMPORTANT
This is not a true story and you may have received other versions related to urine or droppings of mouse / rat killing someone. Find out what Snopes has to say on this message before you forward it around.
---------------------------------------------------------------
> A stock clerk was sent to clean up a storeroom in
> Maui , Hawaii .
>
> When he got back, he was complaining that the
> storeroom was really
> filthy and that he had noticed dried mouse/rat
> droppings in some
> areas.!
> A couple of days later, he started to feel like he
> was coming down
> with a stomach flu, complained of sore joints and
> headaches, and began
> to vomit.
>
> He went to bed and never really got up again. Within
> two days he was
> severely ill and weak. His blood sugar count was
> down to 66, and his
> face and eyeballs were yellow. He was rushed to the
> emergency at
> Pali-Momi, where he was diagnosed to be suffering
> from massive organ
> failure. He died shortly before midnight.
> No one would have made the connection between his
> job and his death,
> had it not been for a doctor who specifically asked
> if he had been in
> a warehouse or exposed to dried rat/mouse droppings
> at anytime. They
> said there is a virus (much like the Hanta virus)
> that lives in dried
> rat and mouse droppings.
>
> Once dried, these droppings are like dust and can
> easily be breathed
> in or ingested if a person does not wear protective
> gear or fails to
> wash face and hands thoroughly .
>
>
>
>
> An autopsy was performed on the clerk to verify the
> doctor's suspicions...
>
> This is why it is extremely important to ALWAYS
> carefully rinse off
> the tops of canned sodas or foods, and to wipe off
> pasta packaging,
> cereal boxes, and so on.
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Almost everything you buy in a supermarket was
> stored in a warehouse
> at one time or another, and stores themselves often
> have rodents.
>
> Most of us remember to wash vegetables and fruits
> but never think of
> boxes and cans.
>
>
> The ugly truth is, even the most modern,
> upper-class, super store has
> rats and mice. And their warehouse most assuredly
> does!
>
> Whenever you buy any canned soft drink, please make
> sure that you wash
> the top with running water and soap or, if that is
> not available,
> drink with a straw.
>
>
> The investigation of soda cans by the Center for
> Disease Control in
> Atlanta discovered that the tops of soda cans can be
> encrusted with
> dried rat's urine, which is so toxic it can be
> lethal. Canned drinks
> and other foodstuffs are stored in warehouses and
> containers that are
> usually infested with rodents, and then they get
> transported to retail
> outlets without being properly cleaned.
>
> Please forward this message to the people you care
> about.
> (I JUST DID!)
---------------------------------------------------------------
> A stock clerk was sent to clean up a storeroom in
> Maui , Hawaii .
>
> When he got back, he was complaining that the
> storeroom was really
> filthy and that he had noticed dried mouse/rat
> droppings in some
> areas.!
> A couple of days later, he started to feel like he
> was coming down
> with a stomach flu, complained of sore joints and
> headaches, and began
> to vomit.
>
> He went to bed and never really got up again. Within
> two days he was
> severely ill and weak. His blood sugar count was
> down to 66, and his
> face and eyeballs were yellow. He was rushed to the
> emergency at
> Pali-Momi, where he was diagnosed to be suffering
> from massive organ
> failure. He died shortly before midnight.
> No one would have made the connection between his
> job and his death,
> had it not been for a doctor who specifically asked
> if he had been in
> a warehouse or exposed to dried rat/mouse droppings
> at anytime. They
> said there is a virus (much like the Hanta virus)
> that lives in dried
> rat and mouse droppings.
>
> Once dried, these droppings are like dust and can
> easily be breathed
> in or ingested if a person does not wear protective
> gear or fails to
> wash face and hands thoroughly .
>
>
>
>
> An autopsy was performed on the clerk to verify the
> doctor's suspicions...
>
> This is why it is extremely important to ALWAYS
> carefully rinse off
> the tops of canned sodas or foods, and to wipe off
> pasta packaging,
> cereal boxes, and so on.
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Almost everything you buy in a supermarket was
> stored in a warehouse
> at one time or another, and stores themselves often
> have rodents.
>
> Most of us remember to wash vegetables and fruits
> but never think of
> boxes and cans.
>
>
> The ugly truth is, even the most modern,
> upper-class, super store has
> rats and mice. And their warehouse most assuredly
> does!
>
> Whenever you buy any canned soft drink, please make
> sure that you wash
> the top with running water and soap or, if that is
> not available,
> drink with a straw.
>
>
> The investigation of soda cans by the Center for
> Disease Control in
> Atlanta discovered that the tops of soda cans can be
> encrusted with
> dried rat's urine, which is so toxic it can be
> lethal. Canned drinks
> and other foodstuffs are stored in warehouses and
> containers that are
> usually infested with rodents, and then they get
> transported to retail
> outlets without being properly cleaned.
>
> Please forward this message to the people you care
> about.
> (I JUST DID!)
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Stop traffic jams? Stop tailing while driving!
Other than starting a car pool, how else can we stop traffic jams? Check out Cool Site of the Day for 7/25/2007 suggestion at Speed Up Traffic!
Something Useful to Share
1. Cure for headaches:
Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead.The throbbing will
go.
2. Use of Soap Wrapper:
Don't throw away the wrapper after removing a bar of soap. Place it inside
your school cabinet or shoe box. It is a cheap way to filling the air with a
nice smell.
3. Are your shoes smelly?
Here's a solution. Put some tea leaves into a pair of stocking stuff each
into a shoe. Leave for day or two and the smell just vanishes.
4. Tips for stamp collectors:
Place the envelope in the freezer for a few hours. You'll then able to
easily lift the stamps off with a pair of tweezers.
5. To keep buttons from dropping off:
Dag a drop of clear nails polish onto the thread that secures the buttons.
This will harden and make it more difficult for the thread to break off.
6. Are cockroaches in! your ho me driving u mad?
Try this tested trick. Fill a large bowl with cheap wine and leave it under
the sink. The pests will drink it, fall in the bowl and drown easy.
7. To avoid hurting your fingers while hammering nails into the wall:
Hold the nails with a wooden clothes peg instead. So even u miss, u won't
get hurt.
8. To get rid of itch from mosquito bite:
Try applying soap on the area - instant relief.
9. Ants, ants, ants, everywhere
Well, they are never said to never cross a chalk line. So get your chalk out
and draw a line on the floor or wherever ants tend to march, see for
yourself.
10. Don't panic if your soup's too salty:
Add cut raw potatoes and throw them away once they are cooked as they have
absorbed the salt. Your soup's saved!
11. Use air-fresher spray to clean mirrors:
It does a good job and better still, give a lovely smell to the shine.
12. If u have problem with slippery shoelaces which refuse to stay:
Rub them with a candle and make them less slippery so that knot stay put
13. If u have stubborn grease stains on your work clothes:
Add a bottle of Coke with detergent. It'll help loosen the grease.
14. Dirty marks on your white court shoes:
Just add some medicated oil on a piece of cloth and clean off the dirty
marks on your white court. They'll be looking as new again.
Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead.The throbbing will
go.
2. Use of Soap Wrapper:
Don't throw away the wrapper after removing a bar of soap. Place it inside
your school cabinet or shoe box. It is a cheap way to filling the air with a
nice smell.
3. Are your shoes smelly?
Here's a solution. Put some tea leaves into a pair of stocking stuff each
into a shoe. Leave for day or two and the smell just vanishes.
4. Tips for stamp collectors:
Place the envelope in the freezer for a few hours. You'll then able to
easily lift the stamps off with a pair of tweezers.
5. To keep buttons from dropping off:
Dag a drop of clear nails polish onto the thread that secures the buttons.
This will harden and make it more difficult for the thread to break off.
6. Are cockroaches in! your ho me driving u mad?
Try this tested trick. Fill a large bowl with cheap wine and leave it under
the sink. The pests will drink it, fall in the bowl and drown easy.
7. To avoid hurting your fingers while hammering nails into the wall:
Hold the nails with a wooden clothes peg instead. So even u miss, u won't
get hurt.
8. To get rid of itch from mosquito bite:
Try applying soap on the area - instant relief.
9. Ants, ants, ants, everywhere
Well, they are never said to never cross a chalk line. So get your chalk out
and draw a line on the floor or wherever ants tend to march, see for
yourself.
10. Don't panic if your soup's too salty:
Add cut raw potatoes and throw them away once they are cooked as they have
absorbed the salt. Your soup's saved!
11. Use air-fresher spray to clean mirrors:
It does a good job and better still, give a lovely smell to the shine.
12. If u have problem with slippery shoelaces which refuse to stay:
Rub them with a candle and make them less slippery so that knot stay put
13. If u have stubborn grease stains on your work clothes:
Add a bottle of Coke with detergent. It'll help loosen the grease.
14. Dirty marks on your white court shoes:
Just add some medicated oil on a piece of cloth and clean off the dirty
marks on your white court. They'll be looking as new again.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Microwaving an Egg - scary!!
I have received a word document detailing how someone boiled an egg between two mobiles phones after communicating through them for 65 minutes. Before you forward this message around or throw away your mobile phone and microwave oven, find out who is behind this prank. Hoax Slayer have all the answers.
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Two moon on 27 August, 2007
This phenomena happened in year 2003! So, before you forward this message around, read what Snopes and Hoax Slayer have to say first.
But if you curious about past, present or future eclipses, NASA has posted information about them on their Eclipse HomePage. You will read that there will be a total eclipse of the moon on 28 August 2007, though.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
*27th Aug the Whole World is waiting for.............* Planet Mars will be
the brightest in the night sky starting August. It will look as
large as
the full moon to the naked eye. This will cultivate on Aug. 27 when Mars comes
within 34.65M miles of earth. Be sure to watch the sky on Aug. 27 12:30 am
It will look like the earth has 2 moons. The next time Mars may come this
close is in 2287.
Share this with your friends as NO ONE ALIVE TODAY will ever see it again
But if you curious about past, present or future eclipses, NASA has posted information about them on their Eclipse HomePage. You will read that there will be a total eclipse of the moon on 28 August 2007, though.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
*27th Aug the Whole World is waiting for.............* Planet Mars will be
the brightest in the night sky starting August. It will look as
large as
the full moon to the naked eye. This will cultivate on Aug. 27 when Mars comes
within 34.65M miles of earth. Be sure to watch the sky on Aug. 27 12:30 am
It will look like the earth has 2 moons. The next time Mars may come this
close is in 2287.
Share this with your friends as NO ONE ALIVE TODAY will ever see it again
Friday, July 20, 2007
Happy reading
School: A place where Papa pays and son plays.
Life insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die rich.
Nurse: A person who wakes you up to give you sleeping pills.
Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.
Divorce: Future tense of marriage.
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.
Life insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die rich.
Nurse: A person who wakes you up to give you sleeping pills.
Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.
Divorce: Future tense of marriage.
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.
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