children write about the ocean

> 1) - This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly, age
> 6)
>
> 2) - Oysters' balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age 6)
> 3) - If you are surrounded by ocean you are an island. If you don't have
> ocean all round you, you are incontinent. ( Wayne, age 7)
>
> 4) - Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily
> Richardson. She's not my friend any more. (Kylie, age 6)
> 5) - A dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of its head. (Billy,
> age 8)
>
> 6) - My uncle goes out in his boat with 2 other men and a woman and pots
> and comes back with crabs. (Millie, age 6)
>
> 7) - When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the
> ocean. Sometimes when the wind didn't blow the sailors would whistle to
> make the wind come. My brother said they would have been better off eating
> beans. (William, age 7)
>
> 8) - Mermaids live in the ocean . I like mermaids. They are beautiful and
> I like their shiny tails, but how on earth do mermaids get pregnant? Like,
> really? (Helen, age 6)
>
> 9) - I'm not going to write about the ocean. My baby brother is always
> crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister has just got
> pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy, age 6)
>
> 10) - Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give
> you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they
> have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher, age 7)
>
> 11) - When you go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it makes my
> willy small. (Kevin, age 6)
>
> 12) - Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Divers can't go
> down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky, age 8)
>
> 13) - On vacation my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was
> going very fast. She says she won't do it again because water fired right
> up her big fat ass. (Julie, age 7)
>
> 14)-The ocean is made up of water and fish. Why the fish don't drown I
> don't know. (Bobby, age 6)
>
> 15)-My dad was a sailor on the ocean. He knows all about the ocean. What
> he doesn't know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom. (James,
> age 7)